Thursday, 10 April 2014

Anti Social Media

The last few weeks haven't been my greatest. I'm short with people, snappier than usual and I guess, if I were brutally honest, really unpleasant to be around.

I've changed medication, I'm trying to eat, get more rest and 'just keep swimming'. Cos right now that's all I can do. I'm also trying to surround myself with positive people, friends who lift me when I need it, give me space when I need that and understand the deep dark hole I'm in. 

I'm also taking a break from (anti)social media. Twitter, Instagram and Facebook are full of shinyhappypeople. With perfect lives, families, jobs, spouses, kids and teeth. 

No one reveals their dark sides here. No one tells you that parenting can be the most soul destroying thing in the world. No one admits to wanting to smash their out of control kids' heads against a wall. There aren't too many admissions about financial stress and marital distress. And I'm tired. I'm tired of feeling inadequate looking at the endless selfies, reading about perfect lives. 

With ALL of this in mind, there's a few lessons I've learnt that I want my children to know. Especially my daughter. 

With all the pressures in real time, there's really no need to subject yourself to extra stress in your timeline. So here goes...

You are not the sum total of your followers, likes and retweets

A selfie does not a person make. Or validate. Emma you're gorgeous inside and out, every second, every moment of the day. There's no need to post pictures of yourself and wait for the comments and likes to flood in

Your 500 friends on Facebook aren't actually friends. Your friends are those people who take the time to see you, are there when you need them (even when you don't want them to be) and give you real hugs

Your real friends also know you beyond your Facebook status and 140 character tweets

To lose a follower on twitter isn't the end of the world. Nor is a subtweet

Don't get caught up capturing photos for Instagram. You'll miss out on the real magic 

Tweet people like you'd like to be tweeted and treat them like you would in real life

If you've got nothing nice to say don't say it on social platforms. And don't put up with people who do 

Facebook is a great distraction. But so is a real book

Give you and your phone a time out occasionally and always love the one you're having coffee with. Not the one in your phone

Life is made up of precious moments. Sometimes in the car, at a playground, while reading a book or having a chat. Not every moment has to be captured on Instagram to be special 

And so Emma, while we all need technology to stay in touch, it can often be the very reason we lose touch. 

As you get older and more techno savvy always stay savvy 


Friday, 4 April 2014

Life's one big party

I never ever thought there'd be a time when I'd be too busy to blog but my little business is keeping me out of trouble.

Just like Emma and Ben, my other 'baby' is growing and I'm blessed with all the support and encouragement I receive from friends on a daily basis.

Here are a few pics from recent parties. Most of them captured by Catherine Scott Photography, others by me xxx

Thursday, 13 February 2014

I believe in angels

I believe in angels. Not the arrow shooting Cupid ones. Real angels that look after me and keep me safe. I believe in them more than ever after Saturday night.

After leaving a party on Saturday evening (setting up one, not attending) I was on the highway back from Midrand. You know the one. The busy one. It started to drizzle and soon it was pouring. I wasn't in a hurry. 

I was thinking about what I'd do with Emma and Ben once home. I had bought lots of arts and crafts things a few days before and was excited to spend time with them. 

As the rain got heavier I moved over to the middle lane, letting the speedsters get to where they needed to be so urgently. Life was good. I was happy. And then I hit a large puddle of water and I felt my car skid a little. Remembering not to brake, I went with it until the slight skid turned into aqua planing and then I panicked. As I spun out of control towards the middle barrier I remember trying to swerve to miss it, and realizing I had over corrected I tried to straighten out again. But at this point there was nothing I could do. I literally let go of the steering wheel and thought to myself, what happens now, happens. I can't say my life flashed before my eyes. But Emma, Ben and Mark were in my thoughts. And I hoped that they would be okay without me and that they'd manage to move on. 

What felt like an hour was minutes and once I had spun across the four lanes, I side swiped a pole and came to a stop with the nose of my car slightly touching a fence in front of me. The impact had ripped the passenger's rear view mirror off and somehow it had come flying in the through the little window. I think that hit me on the side of the head. Other than that I was unhurt. Untouched. 

The miracle was that while all this was happening there was not one car close to me. Not one. No other cars that I could have hit and hurt the people inside. No other family that might have lost a loved one that night. 

As I stumbled out of the car. Yes, I stumbled. A young family stopped and the husband came running over to see if I was ok. And as we stood on the side of the road, him hugging me as I sobbed, the highway busied up again to its usual manic madness. With cars speeding by every few seconds, we both thanked God and our angels. Sincerely. 

My car's a write off but I am alive. And I am thankful and grateful and more aware of the angels that keep me safe than ever.